Becoming “Mum”

I miss the ‘old’ me, or should I say the young me? The ‘old’ me was slim and gorgeous, could turn heads everywhere she went, sexy, fun, bubbly and a raging party goer! She had time to straighten her hair, perfect her make-up, choose a killer outfit and spend hours in front of the mirror if she wanted to. The ‘old’ me had time to relax, read, talk on the phone for hours, stay out clubbing all night long and generally do whatever the F she wanted. These days the ‘new’ me or really I should say the now old me, does not have time to apply eyeliner every morning let alone do all of the above and the ‘new’ me is not such a head turner anymore. The ‘new’ me wears mummy shirts and knee length pants as opposed to skin tight short dresses due to now having ‘muffin tops’. The ‘new’ me wears her hair in a bun almost every single day of her life as opposed to having perfectly primped and preened hair swishing luxuriously down her back. The ‘new’ me does not laugh very often but rather emits crass words every few minutes, its safe to say that her favorite phrase is “oh fucking hell”. The ‘new’ me knows what it is to be S-T-R-E-S-S-E-D. The ‘new’ me can rarely watch a full movie from start to finish in one go (it literally takes me about a week to get through a whole movie). The ‘new’ me hardly ever gets a good nights sleep, but is this really a new development? I guess the only difference is that the ‘new’ me is not sleeping well because of the rugrats whereas the ‘old’ me did not sleep well because she was too busy getting on the piss.

On the plus side the ‘new’ me is not timid like the ‘old’ me, she knows how to stand up for herself and as a result has been promoted no less than three times since ‘becoming mum’. The ‘new’ me has two adorable little boys (well, adorable rugrats I should say) who say the darnedest things that make me smile and feel greatful to have them in my life. The ‘new’ me has been dubbed “the best mummy ever” by her 5 year old (God bless him). The ‘new’ me can drive a car (gasp!) I had to learn so I could take my brood places, like the hospital for example! The ‘new’ me got her priorities together and now is a home owner!

I guess ‘becoming Mum’ has been rewarding all in all, but it’s nice to dream about the me I used to be. I’m sure all you Mummies have things you miss about your pre-mummy years, please feel free to share in the comments!


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